T. R. Smith, comp. Poetica Erotica: Rare and Curious Amatory Verse. 1921–22.
The Disappointment
By Thomas DUrfey (16531723)(From Songs Complete, 1719) THE CLOCK had struck, faith I cannot tell what, | |
But Morning was come as Grey as a Cat; | |
Cocks and Hens from their Roosts did fly, | |
Grunting Hogs too had left their sty; | |
When in a Vale, | 5 |
Carrying a Pail, | |
Sissly her new Lover met, Dapper Harry; | |
First they Kissed, | |
Then shook Fist, | |
Then talked as Fools do, that just were to Marry. | 10 |
Zooks cried Hal, I can’t but think, | |
Now we are come to Wedlock brink; | |
How pure a stock ’twill be how fine, | |
When you put your good mark to mine; | |
Siss at that, | 15 |
Growing hot, | |
Bussed him as if she’d have burnt him to Tinder; | |
Thus they Woo, | |
But see how, | |
Damned Fate contrived now the Bargain to hinder. | 20 |
Sissly had got a Cold I suppose, | |
And ’twixt her Fingers was blowing her Nose; | |
Harry, that Linen too wanted I doubt, | |
Lent her his Glove, to serve for a Clout; | |
Scraping low, | 25 |
Manners to show, | |
And tell her how much he was her adorer: | |
Pray mark the Joke, | |
Leather thong broke, | |
And Breeches fell down to his Ankles before her. | 30 |
Sissly who saw him thus distrest, | |
Pulls of her Garter of woolen List; | |
And with a sly and leering look, | |
Gave it to mend up what was broke; | |
Fumbling he, | 35 |
Could not see, | |
What he discovered, tho’ e’er he had tied all: | |
For just before, | |
Shirt was tore, | |
And as the Devil would have’t she had spied all. | 40 |
She gave him then so cold a Look, | |
Discontent it plainly spoke; | |
And running from him near a Mile, | |
He overtook her at a stile; | |
Too much hast, | 45 |
Milk down cast, | |
And topsy turvy she fell on her Pole with’t: | |
He seeing that, | |
Runs with’s Hat, | |
But could not Cover her C—— for his soul with’t: | 50 |
Have you not seen at Noon of Day, | |
The Sun his glorious Face display; | |
So Sissly shone with Beauty’s Rays, | |
Reflecting from her Postern grace; | |
Till at last | 55 |
Struggling past, | |
Wide sprawling Legs were again set in order: | |
But poor Hal, | |
Since her fall, | |
Stood just like one was found guilty of Murder. | 60 |
The God of Love, or else old Nick, | |
Sure had designed this Devilish trick, | |
To make the Bridegroom and the Bride; | |
With themselves dissatisfied; | |
She grown coy, | 65 |
Called him Boy, | |
He getting from her cried Zoons you’re a rouzer. | |
Foh, she cried, | |
By things spied, | |
She had as live a mere Baby should espouse her. | 70 |