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Home  »  Poetica Erotica  »  Joan to Her Lady

T. R. Smith, comp. Poetica Erotica: Rare and Curious Amatory Verse. 1921–22.

Joan to Her Lady

Anonymous
 
(From Pills to Purge Melancholy, 1707)

LADY, sweet, now do not frown,
Nor in Anger call me Clown,
For your servant Joan may prove,
Like your self, as deep in Love;
And as absolute a Bit,        5
Man’s sweet liquorish Tooth to fit.
  The Smock alone the difference makes,
  ’Cause yours is spun of finer Flax.
 
What avails the Name of Madam?
Came not all from Father Adam?        10
Where does one exceed the other?
Was not Eve our common Mother?
Then what odds ’twixt you and Joan?
Truly in my Judgment, none.
 
Ladies are but Blood and Bone,        15
Skin and Sinews, so is Joan.
Joan’s a Piece for a man to bore,
With his Wimble, your’s no more.
Then what odds ’twixt you and Joan?
Truly in my Judgment, none.        20
 
It is not your flaunting Tires,
Are the cause of Men’s Desires;
They’re other Darts which Lusts pursue,
Those Joan has as well as you.
Then what odds ’twixt you and Joan?        25
Truly in my Judgment, none.
 
What care we for Glorious Lights,
Women are used in the Nights;
And in Night in Women-kind,
Kings and Clowns like Sport do find.        30
Then what odds ’twixt you and Joan?
Truly in my Judgment, none.
 
Where there two in Bed together,
There’s no a Pin to chuse ’twixt either;
Both have Eyes, and both have Lips;        35
Both have Thighs and both have Hips.
Then what odds ’twixt you and Joan?
Truly in my Judgment, none.
 
When your Hand puts out the Candle,
And you at last begin to handle,        40
Then you go about to do
What you should be done unto.
Then what odds ’twixt you and Joan?
Truly in my Judgment, none.
 
Who can but in Conscience say,        45
Fie, fie, for shame away, away,
Putting Finger in the Eye,
Till you have a fresh Supply.
When what odds ’twixt you and Joan?
Truly in my Judgment, none.        50