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The World’s Wit and Humor: An Encyclopedia in 15 Volumes. 1906.

Manuel Bretón de los Herreros (1796–1873)

Two Rival Lovers Gulled

Andrés.A pity the sun is not shining now! I would like to gaze upon those divine features. But on yonder corner the lamp is going out. Thither I will go. My impatience—(He turns to the right.)

Miguel(turning at the same time to the left).Her mother has certainly had a sudden attack.(He perceives DON ANDRÉS.)But there is somebody!

Andrés(seeing MIGUEL).A man!

Miguel.Who goes there?

Andrés.Make room!

Miguel.That is Andrés’s voice.

Andrés.If I mistake not— Yes, it is he—Miguel.

Miguel.Captain?

Andrés.I did not expect to find you on the street at this hour. Is this your beat?

Miguel.Are you paying court to some one?

Andrés.I am,

Miguel.What a girl she is! The fire of her eye, her mouth like a rose in May, and a hand——

Miguel.My beloved is without defects! So affectionate, so true! There is not another such charming girl in all Seville!

Andrés.Faithful?

Miguel.Extraordinarily so. And yours?

Andrés.A jewel! I am the happiest of lovers.

Miguel.You have no rivals?

Andrés.None. And I fear none!

Miguel.Nor do I. Do you call on her?

Andrés.No. Do you?

Miguel.I do not. Her mother is a strange person.

Andrés.The mother of my adored one is possessed of the Evil One. But what of it, if my beloved becomes mine?

Miguel.Mine gave me, this evening— Heavens—I am mad for joy—a hand!

Andrés.Mine allowed me to kiss both her hands.

Miguel.My sweetheart has retired. Her mother became ill.

Andrés.My future mother-in-law, too, was not well.

Miguel.Our conversation was interrupted, as my dear one had to sit up with the old dame.

Andrés.And meanwhile you were holding a monologue at the lattice? Strange! I have fared the same way. I fear— Tell me, your siren does not live far from here?

Miguel.No; there is her house.

Andrés(examining the place).Alas! My hope is gone! She has a second window opening upon another street.

Miguel.What do I hear? Infamous treason!

Andrés.A rascally intrigue! She engaged to meet us both at the same time—you at one window, me at the other.

Miguel.It is impossible! Her tenderness——

Andrés.Give me your lady’s name!

Miguel.Camilla.

Andrés.Camilla. It is she! Oh, the faithless one! to play with me, to treat me thus! And yet, even if she be false, I adore her. Draw your sword and strike, or renounce her!

Miguel.Do not expect me to stand back! I know that I am the favored one.

Andrés.If my constancy is thus trampled upon, I hope at least to avenge myself by killing you first, and then her.

Miguel.Let the duel start at once.

Andrés.Good fortune to the victor!

Miguel.Love will make me invincible. Now, then!

Andrés.Have a care!(Both fight for a few moments. ANDRÉS stops.)Listen. Though my happiness is shaken, I do not doubt that Camilla loves me; but being, after all, an unlucky person, I might easily be pierced by a thrust of your sword. I do not for that reason shun your weapon. I am so jealous that I would fight the Cid himself. But if this duel is to be my death, the likeness of the detestable creature shall be your inheritance. Take it from my breast when I heave the last sigh, so that such a marvel may not fall into the hands of a common thief.

Miguel.If your sword despatches me, I, too, will give you— But speak: how came you by Camilla’s likeness?

Andrés.She gave it to me this night, with many caresses, and I——

Miguel.Will you show it to me?

Andrés.Yes, here it is.

Miguel.What a shameful betrayal! I gave it to the false one to-night. It is my work. I painted her from memory!

Andrés.If she is not the devil’s own daughter, then——

Miguel.And to me the tender, the grateful, the proud one gave this ring.

Andrés.Let me see! I tremble with rage! It is mine! It contains my hair!

Miguel.Your hair? And I, great heavens, have kissed it passionately!

Andrés.What has become of our love?

Miguel.A game of dice!

Andrés.Yet, even if I do feel my shame——

Miguel.Even if I do see her falsehood, I still love her!

Andrés.I still adore her!

Miguel.Thus wills my star, which I must follow!

Andrés.As great, oh, Miguel, is my infatuation!

Miguel.But does this faithless one deserve that we kill each other for her sake?

Andrés.No. Let us sheathe our swords.

Miguel.And what, I ask you, shall we do now?

Andrés.Let us settle this matter like good comrades. I do not feel the strength to abandon her to you.

Miguel.I claim her for myself.

Andrés.So do I.

Miguel.There is the difficulty.

Andrés.We will not fight for her. But I have an idea. She cannot possibly love us both with equal ardor.

Miguel.Secretly she must prefer one of us.

Andrés.Let her decide. I will abide by her decision.

Miguel.And I will renounce her if she vows to make you happy.

Andrés.So will I.

Miguel.Agreed!

Andrés.Upon honor!

Miguel.Upon honor!