T. R. Smith, comp. Poetica Erotica: Rare and Curious Amatory Verse. 1921–22.
The Interview with Varus and His Mistress
By Gaius Valerius Catullus (c. 84–c. 54 B.C.)(Translated by George Lamb, 1821) |
AS I was idling time away | |
| Just by the Forum t’ other day, | |
| My Varus took me thence | |
| To see the wanton, hid delight; | |
| And, faith! she struck me at first sight | 5 |
| To want nor charms nor sense. | |
| We then fell into conversation | |
| About Bithynia’s situation, | |
| The value of the land, | |
| And what my profit there had been: | 10 |
| I mention’d truly all I’d seen, | |
| And how things really stand. | |
| “That not the Pretor nor his train | |
| Could there afford from any gain | |
| More sumptuous dress or fare; | 15 |
| And sure not we, that Pretor’s slaves, | |
| The worst of profligates and knaves, | |
| Who prized us not a hair. | |
| “Of course,” she said, “as they relate | |
| ’Tis usual, you some slaves for state | 20 |
| To bear your litter bought.” | |
| I felt a little pride arise; | |
| And was not willing in her eyes | |
| To be a pauper thought. | |
| So cried, “Oh, yes. Though luck was bad, | 25 |
| It was not on the whole so sad, | |
| That I eight slaves should lack.” | |
| In truth, I never here nor there | |
| Possess’d a single slave to bear | |
| My litter on his back. | 30 |
| Said she, a harlot thorough bred! | |
| “Catullus, lend me, pray, that bed, | |
| I wish but to be taken | |
| To where Serapis holds his fane”—— | |
| “Start stay!” said I, “let’s think again— | 35 |
| I’ve none—I was mistaken. | |
| “’Tis China’s bed, scarce his alone, | |
| I use it just as ’twere my own: | |
| Who’s owner nought care I. | |
| Thou’rt an uncivil, troublous jade, | 40 |
| Whose artful mercenary trade | |
| Won’t let one tell a lie.” | |