Edmund Clarence Stedman, ed. (1833–1908). An American Anthology, 1787–1900. 1900.

By Charles EdmundMerrill, Jr.

1729 Persicos Odi

BOY, I detest these modern innovations,

The Voice crusade may alter some men’s habit,

But, as for me, I ’ll stick to my old rations,

Ale and a rarebit.

In vino vis. The pious dames of Ipswich,

Knowing its worth and fearing lest men waste it,

Condemn its use in christening battle-ships which

Can’t even taste it.

Old Cato Major (and, no doubt, his wife, too)

Found in Falernian, mixed with milder Massic,

Courage which led him, at his time of life, to

Read the Greek classic.

Yes, Cato drank, nor should we lightly damn a

Man who, at eighty and without coercion,

Mastered Liddell and Scott, and Hadley’s grammar,

My pet aversion.

Elihu’s ways, they say, are growing sinful;

Crimes that are nameless are committed daily.

Oscar! my toby, and I ’ll sin a skinful,

So to bed gayly.