Edmund Clarence Stedman, ed. (1833–1908). A Victorian Anthology, 1837–1895. 1895.
Margaret Veley 184387First or Last?
M
Must die—it has a ghostly sound,
A far-off thunder drawing nigh,
An echo as from underground.
Yes, I must die who fain would live;
You cannot give me life—alas!
Dear Love of mine, you can but give
One latest kiss before I pass.
Kisses on cheek, and lip, and brow,
But soul to soul, as now we kiss,
I think we never kiss’d till now.
Give both your hands, and let the earth
Roll onward—let what will befall.
This is an hour of wondrous birth,
And can it be the end of all?
(Clasp me, O love, your faith is mine,
Only my weakness made me shrink)
That I am standing on the brink
Of night where never dawn will shine,
Of slumber whence I shall not wake,
Of darkness where no life will grope;
I know your hopeless creed, and take
My part therein for your dear sake,—
We stand asunder if I hope.
Where you and I were met at last,
And face to face, and hand in hand,
Smil’d at the sorrow overpast.
The eastern sky was touch’d with fire,
In the dim woodlands cooed the dove,
Earth waited, tense with strong desire,
For day—your coming, O my love!
The breeze awoke to breathe your name,
And through the leafy maze I came
With feet that could not turn aside,
With eyes that would not be denied—
My lips, my heart a rosy flame,
Because you kiss’d me ere I died.
Death could but part us for a while;
Beyond the boundary of years
We met again—oh, do not smile
That tender smile, more sad than tears!
Your faith is mine—your faith is best;
Let others count the joys they gain,
I am a thousand times more blest.
They can but give a scanty dole
Out of a life made safe in heaven,
While I am sovereign o’er the whole,
I can give all—and all is given!
Faith such as ours defies the grave,
Nor needs a dream of bliss above—
Shall not this moment make me brave?
O aloe flower of perfect love!
What though the end of all be come,
The latest hour, the latest breath,
This is life’s triumph, and its sum,
The aloe-flower of love and death!
That throbs in anguish through my heart,
Leads up to wage despairing strife,
And shudders, loathing to depart.
Can such desire be born in vain,
Crush’d by inevitable doom?
While you let live can Love be slain?
Can Love lie dead within my tomb?
And when you die—that hopeless day
When darkness comes and utmost need,
And I am dead and cold, you say,
Will Death have power to hold his prey?
Shall I not know? Shall I not heed?
When your last sun, with waning light,
Below the sad horizon dips,
Shall I not rush from out the night
To die once more upon your lips?
Stoop down, O Love, and hold me fast.
O empty earth! O empty sky!
There is no answer, though I die
Breathing my soul out in the cry,
Is it the first kiss—or the last?